AllyZabba has partnered with Adrienne and Jim to raise funds for their adoption. Read their letter and participate by clicking the link below.
How do we begin to express to you how much it would mean to us to be able to adopt another baby? All our lives, we’ve looked forward to becoming parents. When I (Adrienne) was a child, I was the little girl at all of the family gatherings with a baby on my hip, pretending to be a mommy. I loved baby dolls more than any other toy and insisted on having the ones that felt and looked like real babies. I have a sister who is 2 years younger than I am and have been accused of “mothering” her all her life. I went to college and graduate school for 5 years to become a speech pathologist, but my ultimate goal has always been to be a Mommy. Jim always said as a child when he grew up he wanted to be a Daddy. He wanted to teach his children to play sports if they were interested, to enjoy working and being outside, and to be able to spend time with them as a family the way his parents did with him. When we were dating, we talked about all of the children we would have when we got married and all of the fun things we would do and places we would go together. While we waited for our first child, we were constantly surrounded by children. I worked full time as a pediatric speech pathologist, part-time as a nanny on Saturdays, and taught 2-year old Sunday school on Sundays with Jim. We were the childless couple that babysat all of our friends’ children so that they could have date nights. We wanted so much to have children of our own to share our love with.
In 2004, after we had been married 2 years, both earned Master’s degrees, and had great jobs as a federal property manager (Jim) and a pediatric speech-language pathologist (Adrienne), we decided it was the perfect time to have our first child. After babysitting children for many years, welcoming many nieces and nephews, and teaching children at work and church, we were so excited to learn we were pregnant just a few months later. It was a fear of ours that when we finally decided it was the right time to have children that we wouldn’t be able to get pregnant so we were so pleasantly surprised to conceive so quickly. We were in love with our child from the moment we learned we were expecting. We were so excited about our first ultrasound, to see our baby for the first time. Seeing the baby’s heartbeat was such a beautiful experience. Just one week later, we realized something was wrong and repeated the ultrasound. On the screen where our healthy baby was just a week before, we saw the baby but no heartbeat. Our baby we’d hoped and prayed for for so long had died. We were so devastated. Six months later, we became pregnant again, only to have the same thing happen again. This happened 3 more times, for a total of 5 losses. With each baby, we have fallen in love only to have our babies taken away.
After our 3rd miscarriage, our dreams of becoming parents came true at last when we welcomed Owen through adoption. What an absolute joy he is!!! We have always loved children, but we never knew just how much we could love a child until Owen came home to be our son. During Owen’s adoption, we were asked every question under the sun—”How can you love a child that’s ‘not your own?,'” How do you know the child is going to be healthy?,” “Why don’t you try (pregnancy) again—you get pregnant so easily?,” “Don’t they know what’s causing the babies to die?,” “Don’t you want to find a surrogate so you can have a child that’s yours?,” and more. We always had the same answer. When we first started dating almost 12 years ago, we made the decision that we wanted to adopt children someday, and that these children would be just as special to us as one we conceived in my womb. We knew that if we couldn’t have a baby biologically through pregnancy, we would adopt a child and loved the idea of being able to help a child and mother who needed us. We didn’t want to pay a surrogate thousands of dollars just to be able to have a biological child, when we could adopt and be able to give a home and family to a baby who needed one. After our 3rd miscarriage, we knew God was telling us to adopt and not to wait any longer. After our son Owen came home, we wished so much we had chosen adoption sooner!! He is such an incredible gift and joy to us!!
We know we are supposed to adopt again. Within the year after Owen came home, we were thrilled to find out we were pregnant again on two different occasions, only to see healthy babies die again. With Owen’s adoption, we requested (boy or girl) twins or a child under 18 months old, including children with special needs. Owen was selected for us by the Russian government and became our son at nearly 19 months old. He was a 27-28 week preemie and had been so neglected for such a long time in the orphanage setting , he had to overcome many obstacles once he came home, but with consistent love, affection, nutrition, and intensive speech therapy (by us at home), he has blossomed into a very bright, healthy, loving, joyful little boy! He has grown 10 inches and gained 14 pounds in just one year!! We have been so blessed for me (Adrienne) to be able to stay at home with him full-time and for Jim to be able to be home from work by 4 pm each weekday and home all weekend to join us for family time. We are very hands-on, dedicated parents who enjoy playing with Owen and teaching him new things each day. Now that Owen has been home for more than a year and is almost 3 years old, we are more than ready to welcome more children into our lives. Owen is so excited to become a big brother.
We want so much to have more children. We promise to love our future children as though we gave birth to them, the same way we devote all of our love and attention to helping Owen reach every bit of his potential each and every day, making sure he knows just how much he is loved and how special he is. They would have everything they ever needed, would go to good schools and church, live in a safe neighborhood full of families with young children (and our closest friends), would enjoy fun vacations, and be surrounded by a big extended family full of people who love them more than anything else in the world! When we were going through the process to adopt Owen, our friends and family gave us SIX baby showers!! Because we were preparing for adopting children in such a broad age range and of either gender, we have tons of toys, clothes, and supplies for babies birth to 3 years old!! In addition to their daily wants and needs, we would also make sure they know just how much their families love them and want them to be happy and to have everything they deserve! They would know where they came from and what a gift they are, how desired they were before we even knew they had been born. They would be answers to the many prayers we’ve prayed so long.
Every night before we go to bed, we find ourselves talking about Owen and what our future holds. We pray for whoever is carrying our future children, how their birth families are doing, how the birthmother is feeling, and how much we would cherish her baby if we adopted them. We don’t know if we will ever be able to have the gift of a normal pregnancy and childbirth, of having biological children, but know we are meant to give a home and family to children who were born not from our bodies but those we’ve held in our hearts for many years. The love we have for each other is so strong, and we want nothing more than to share our love with more children the way we love and cherish Owen. We are so grateful to even be considered as potential parents for another sweet little child. Thank you for taking the time to read this letter and for your help in making our dream come true. It means more to us than you’ll ever know!!
Adrienne and Jim
After you click the “Participate” button below, 30% of everything you buy from AllyZabba.com will be applied towards the adoption.